Before You Run

Punk D

Before You Run, Music; 4:01

Interview by L. Valena
January 15, 2024

Can you start by describing the prompt that you responded to?

I was handed a bar of chocolate, on the side of the road in Jamaica Plain.

There was a hell of a hand-off moment. What was it like to receive that chocolate bar?

I was really thrilled, actually. This process reminded me a lot of the playful-yet-serious times in my past. Middle school creative activities which inevitably fostered a sense of connection and inspiration between people. It felt reminiscent of that, but also I'm feeling good about my music now and do want to be challenged. The two-week deadline gave it a very thrilling quality. Receiving a bar of chocolate on a street corner outside the police station made me feel like I was doing something a little bit sneaky. But it was all in the name of art!

Exactly! What are they going to do, arrest us for possessing chocolate? What was it like to taste the chocolate?

I think it was the best chocolate I've ever had, to be honest. I was very drawn to the crunch and texture of it. I do identify as a kind of synesthetic person, so understanding that I would be creating something in response to it was helpful. Something can taste or smell really good, but not necessarily have those extra layers. It was a really exciting process. I liked the bitterness. I didn't notice the decoration on the back until later, which was also exciting. I let some friends and family try it as well, and they got this smoky, spicy note. I didn't really get the spice, but I did get the smoke, which was kind of cool. It was a really cool, multi-dimensional experience.

What happened next? Where did you go from there?

I was trying to figure out what elements of my experience I wanted to pull into a song. I ended up responding a lot to the texture of the chocolate. I thought at first that I would just record the song on a voice memo, because that's often how I share my music. But I wanted to bring in some drums, snaps, and some extra vocals, so I went for it on GarageBand. I did feel like that brought out the texture I was feeling and hearing while inspired by the chocolate, but I was mostly focused on the guitar – crunchy, gritty tones.

I wasn't sure what to write about lyrically, but I just kind of let what I was finding in the guitar inspire words. I was writing about a deep connection that's about to disappear because of world events or violence. That idea of receiving joy or something cool at a time of distress in the world.

There is a very post-apocalyptic kind of vibe to this song that I wanted to ask you about. Talk to me more about that.

I was imagining a moment on a mountain that's about to collapse due to an earth or human-created event. The feeling that comes up for me when I'm enjoying something like chocolate is that it's lovely, and then it's done. Before You Run felt like a capsule of that. Before this all goes to shit, let's fall in love. Before it goes to shit, and I disappear and you disappear, let's do this thing. So much is up in the air at the moment, and that's definitely coming up in my writing generally.

That makes sense. It's a very strange moment that we're in. We don't know what will happen next, which is spooky, but we also have to be where our feet are and not spend our lives obsessing about the future, because it will drive us crazy. There's a badass toughness in this song that I really respect, like a swagger, a sense of not cowering in the face of a terrifying situation. That's kind of the energy I'm hoping to bring to this year. Are you riding that wave as well?

It's been hard to think about the coming year. A year is a long time, and a lot can happen during that time. I wouldn't try to be swaggy for clout, but if it helps elicit confidence, and collective energy, love, and power, that feels relevant. But to be fair, I will say that I was thinking less about combat and more about fleeing.

I love that this is part of a longer thread. I think a lot of people worry that stories will get buried under rubble, for valid reasons. So it's cool that there's a documented process happening online. Between that feeling, and the time crunch, it almost reminded me of school, but was way better than school. Deciding that I would use GarageBand, and to not worry that some of the sections may be out of sync rhythmically... There's an unapologetic element to this. Music is music, and rhythm is rhythm. It's okay if something doesn't align, because a song is a song one time, and can be the same song or something different another time.

I care a lot about the world, people, and history. For the past five years I've been trying to write more about my body as a white, queer, mad person. Write about what it feels like to love in terrible times. Write about prisoners who shouldn't be behind bars, and people who shouldn't be getting bombed, and keeping those stories alive through music.

How long have you been playing music?

I grew up singing, and there was a lot of writing and music in my family. I started with poetry. When I was fifteen, I wrote a song about a guy at JP Licks I thought was really cute. It was a funny, jazzy little song. I'm not sure why I wanted to play guitar. I grew up playing the piano, and I still find the piano very formative in how to visually think about music.

I think what was cool about this process is it made me feel less attached to academic music, and perfectionism in general. I think all artists can be really hard on themselves, even if they seem really laid back. I think some people are really gifted, like the people who just have perfect pitch. Some people have to work harder for it, and some people don't have access to instruments. I found it exciting to just take my guitar and make something happen. It was good to take some expedited time to write a song and apply some of the skills I've been working on, and to release some of the patriarchal perfectionist stuff.

I do think my voice is my main instrument. I was at an open mic last night, and someone got everyone in a circle and sang a hymn/protest song. It's cool to think about what we're able to create with the things we have, and how that speaks to a state of emergency or being worried about what's going to happen. I think this song, for me, is about the radical, dissociative state of being in love in a time of violence, which I guess is all the time. There ended up being a lot more grief in the song than I expected. Probably the last line, "The Earth will still spin around even when everyone's dead and gone" was an unintentional reminder to myself. The earth is probably not going away anytime soon.

Right, it's the humans who are in trouble!

Yeah! Just that reminder that I'm so small, and can just do what I can for the people around me.

Do you have any advice for another artist approaching this project for the first time?

Have fun. Everyone is so different. I found it really helpful to have tea and water nearby when I was working on this. I didn't really take any breaks once I got started, and I wouldn't necessarily recommend that. I also wrote some of the lyrics in transit, and found that helpful. I usually write lyrics in between things, and then work on the guitar in one place. I found it fun to share the chocolate bar and not just have it be my own experience. Have fun, and try something.

Anything else you want to say on the record?

All cops are bastards. Land back. One day at a time.

Call Number: V97FD | V98MU.dBe

PUNKY D (any/all), musician, creative, activist; she sings, dances, writes and practices daily. Punky was raised listening to lots of music - including lots of Motown, soul, punk, reggae, blues hip-hop, grunge/rock and various types of folk music. Punky would say her most relevant influences now include: Nina Simone, Jimi Hendrix, Palehound, and Buffy Sainte-Marie. Please feel welcomed to reach out with any musical endeavors, queries, or ideas anytime.